Lest the title deceive you, this is not a post about Toy Story, but let me just go
ahead and say you’re welcome for getting that song stuck in your head. (I could
probably name every blog post from here on out with a Disney quote and never
use the same one twice, but I digress.)
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to be a
good friend. So many of my friends are going through difficult situations right
now, and I feel like I’m here just enjoying my blessed life in the midst of
them. Life seems to pass by in cycles, and I know hard times will come my way
again. But in the meantime, I don’t want to keep myself separate from the
struggles of those around me. I’ve always hated that “Do They Know It’s
Christmas” line, “Tonight thank God it’s them, instead of you.” (Ok, I confess.
Really I hate that entire song.) That’s the polar opposite of the attitude I
desire to have.
Galatians 6:2 is a verse that keeps coming to mind. “Bear
one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” I started thinking
about this particular verse during church this week. We were singing a song
about brokenness, and my mind started to wander. (As a whole, my mind is terribly prone to wandering.) I started
thinking about those who are broken around me- those who are carrying heavy
burdens. Then I began to wonder if I was fulfilling the law of Christ. Am I truly
bearing their burdens?
Honestly, I start to feel a little panicky when I really
start to contemplate ALL of the burdens of those around me. I can barely get my
clan dressed and out the door on time on a regular basis, much less be a help
to everyone else around me! But this
is one of many verses that needs to be read with discernment. I can’t bear the
weight of the world by myself. Only Christ can, and did. What I can do is choose to take a long, hard
look at those who are a part of my life. Who do I know today that is struggling?
What is one small (or maybe big) thing that I can do to help bear their
burden? If I really want those answers, then I am really going to have to look on purpose. It will probably be a
process, and not just one quick check off my to-do list.
And really, I should
be sharing in the good times as well. “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep
with those who weep.” (Rom. 12:15) How can you really share in someone’s grief
if you never shared in their joy? Life is made up of high highs and low lows,
and true friends remain through them all.
I spent a good chunk of my adult life with a backwards view
of what it means to be a friend. (I don’t even want to get into what kind of
friend I was at a younger age. Sheesh.) I prayed and prayed for the
longest time that God would send along a friend who could relate to my every
struggle, who would hold me accountable in all my weak areas, who would walk
with me through thick and thin. I used to meet new people and wonder if they
might finally be the one who would want to be my best
friend. It’s a little embarrassing to put that out there, but it’s the truth. It wasn’t that I had no one- I did. I just had
expectations that were WAY too high. (I think that may be a theme in my life.) I
finally stopped praying for a friend and just asked God to take that longing
away. I prayed that He would fill
that hole in my heart instead. That’s the kind of prayer that God loves to
answer. Looking back now, I can see how much I took my friends for granted. I
failed to appreciate the good times, small gestures, and listening ears. So much, if not
all, of the problem was me. I was waiting for needs to be met that could only
be met by God, and I certainly wasn’t being the kind of friend that I kept hoping others
would be to me.
All of that to say that the concept of friendship has now
come full circle for me. This is not intended as a pat on the back for myself
in any way. It’s not that I’ve arrived in this area- it’s just that I’ve
recognized my need to be a good
friend. (Knowing something is true does not
mean that you apply that truth.) So that’s where I’m at right now. Can I be
the kind of friend who rises above the routine days of filling sippy cups, getting
the kids dressed, changing diapers, re-filling the sippy cups, washing the same
laundry that was dirty last week, making the beds (um….or not), wiping sticky
faces, and re-filling those darn sippy cups again?!
Yes, I can. One day at a time. One act at a time. One burden at a time. Let’s share
in life together.
“Two are
better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For
if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up.”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
No comments:
Post a Comment